And one day I will tell my children how I spent my wild nights in my early 20s... eating leftover cake in the kitchen, wearing a Muppets shirt and petting my cat with my foot.
Adults are liars.
And I mean that nicely.
Curiously enough, there's no how-to book on "here's what it's like to turn 20 and here are the things you'll be feeling on a daily basis." There's no survival kit.
Instead of perusing class schedules, I'm looking at the price of rent in Southern California and slamming my head on the desk, wondering if I'll ever move out of my parent's house.
Instead of spending money on taco tuesday, I'm wondering if I can even afford to apply for a credit card.
Okay, that's a lie. I'll never give up my taco tuesdays.
See? Adults are liars.
I'm realizing more and more that this whole "adulthood" thing is not so much of a sudden transition into reality and responsibilities. It's really more of a "fake it 'til you make it" game. And I wish there were more adults who would be honest about that.
It is so hard for me to believe that every non-teenager in the workforce knew that they would end up exactly as the person they are today in the job they are in today.
Even more unbelievable: that they predicted this future when they were a 20-something. I mean, kudos to them, but I don't even know what my work schedule is for next week.
You know what else I don't know?
I don't know what I'm going to be when I grow up.
But I keep that to myself. It's frowned upon. Lemme tell you why.
I work at a community college. Which, I'm realizing, is the wrong place to be working when you're taking time off of school. All my coworkers (hard-working, career-oriented, no-nonsense adults with higher educations) encourage me (often. very often.) to go back to school.
"People with degrees make more money and receive more benefits."
"Good luck finding a career without at least an Associate's Degree."
"It's okay if you don't know what you want to do. Just get the piece of paper."
Putting statistics aside (to the corner... preferably facing the wall, away from the important grownup conversation): we're not going to talk about underemployed (or unemployed) college graduates. And we're certainly not going to talk about individuals who "got the piece of paper" who aren't even working in the field they majored in. Oh, and student debt is a conversation for another time.
What I would like to talk about is the assumption that I will not succeed without investing 4+ years in college.
I don't mean to be seditious...
But what if that's not the case?
What if I could get an education without college?
What if I could pursue my interests and land a job doing what I love?
What if I could work from home?
You can throw all the statistics you want at me. I'm coming from the clichéd homeschooled perspective that not all humans are the same. We don't behave the same, we don't learn the same, and we don't work the same.
So who's to say we all succeed the same?
I just sent my résumé to a marketing agency. I'm going to sleep in my Batman sweatshirt and I will finish watching these next two episodes of Fringe, curled up with my cat and a bowl of popcorn. Don't bother looking for the last box of Thin Mints. I finished them. Because I'm an ADULT.